CORRECTION

When I got home, I listened to that woman’s voicemail again, and I could hear her a little more clearly.

First of all, it was apparently my daughter who kicked her dog.

And secondly, on a second listen, I now believe the woman’s accent to be Russian. That’s a little scary because I do live in a mostly Russian neighborhood.

But then again, I do not have a daughter.

And for whatever it’s worth, my Caller ID says the call came from something called “Young Hollywood Act–” [the display got cut off].

If this is a joke, whoever you are, you’re hilarious.