HOORAY FOR ME

Well, look who the big winner on American Idol was this week… me! I correctly predicted two of the bottom 3, including boot victim Leah. And that was before I even saw their performances. (After Tuesday’s show, I probably would’ve switched George Huff to Matt Rogers, which still would have been wrong.) Okay, fine, so this week was a gimme. Nobody in the world enjoys Leah’s singing besides Paula, Randy and Leah’s creepy Bulgarian mom.

I’m not sure if they’re humiliating the losers quite enough, though. I mean, forcing the bottom two to sing before telling them results was a nice touch, but maybe from now on, the bottom two should be dep@ntsed* and beaten as well. Remember when Seacrest was the positive one, who’d be nice to the kids even after they lousied up the stage so they wouldn’t go home and slit their wrists? Remember when he didn’t say his own name every five seconds? Remember when he was 28 last year? It almost makes me long for the days of Brian Dun– nah, nevermind. I’d rather have a million depa&ts!ng googles than one hit from somebody looking for D^nkl#m@n info.

This definitely looks to be the year of the diva. Fantasia and LaToya are in a different league than most of those kids. I agree with Simon that Jon Peter Lewis will stick around for a while, but not because he’s nearly as good a singer as the girls (Diana, Jennifer and Jasmine are all pretty outstanding, too). He sings okay, but the guys are way outnumbered this year, and J.P.’s the most interesting of all of them. Then again, laughing and cringing are of pretty much equal value with me, how about you?

I wish that, in addition to the bottom three, they’d tells us who the top vote getter was each week. It’d shake things up a little, give us an early indication of who some of the favorites are, and it’d be something positive amid all the gloom and doom and suspense every week. And as a reward, the winner should be allowed to sit out the embarrassing Brady Bunch Variety Hour dance medley they force the kids to do to fill up time in the results show. (And they make fun of Jon Peter’s dancing?!) Let somebody escape with some dignity, please!

_______________________________

* Sorry for the punctuational euphemism. All those dep@ntsing googles get annoying after a while. Maybe it’s time to reflect on my why I use that word so much…