HOW MY MIND WORKS, CONTINUED
About half an hour ago, I started having a strong craving for Taco Bell, which was weird because I haven’t eaten there, or even thought about eating there, in a long, long time.
Then I realized my craving started around the same time I started checking the basketball scores. See, I don’t know anything about basketball and really don’t care much about it, but I join my friend’s NCAA pool every year because gambling is fun, and if I win I get to go, “Ha, ha, ha! I beat all the jocks!” (Quietly to myself, of course. I’m still scared of jocks.)
Using a complicated formula involving team rankings, my assumptions about what picks other people would make, a possibly ignorant theory that any school with Michigan or Texas in its name is good at sports, and the words “eenie” and “meenie”, I picked UConn to win it all.
And now that there’ve been all kinds of crazy upsets, if UConn’s the champ, I have a pretty good shot at winning the pool. (It helps when half the pool went to Stanford and Stanford loses in round 2.)
So I safecrack into my subconscious and plumb around a bit, and I remember that the time that I visited a friend of mine at UConn, oh so many years ago, it was in a little hick town and there was nowhere to eat, and then he said, “Oh, wait, the Taco Bell just opened!” So we went there, and it was the shabbiest Taco Bell ever, and their dining room was constructed of plastic lawn furniture, which is sort of beside the point, but it was kind of sad.
And even though I know that the reason I stopped going to Taco Bell is that the last time I went there, they didn’t wear gloves while they made my food, I still might pick up a chalupa on the way home tonight.
(I think that’s what their mascot is.)
Update: UConn won, the Huskies are indeed their mascot(s?), and ultimately, after much deliberation, I passed on the chalupa.