SO THIS IS WHAT FOOT TASTES LIKE

A couple of weeks ago, I posted an entry about attending a book signing for a book called “Join Me” by Danny Wallace (which you can see in the recommendation column on the right). Well, guess who read my entry and posted a comment about it? Danny Wallace himself. Consider me humbled.

Of course, I didn’t think anyone read this blog, let alone guys who live on other continents and write books. I certainly never meant to hurt anyone’s feelings, let alone someone I genuinely admired, so, with egg dripping down my face, I decided to write to him in response to his comment in hopes of doing a little fence-mending. And just to clarify my feelings about Mr. Wallace, his book, and the event, here’s what I wrote to him:

Hey, Danny:

I just read your comment on my blog. I really hope what I wrote didn’t offend you. (I just reread it myself, and I do think some of it may have come across as a bit harsh.) To be honest, I’m a little embarrassed — and at the same time flattered — that you read what I wrote about your book and the signing in Pasadena.

Just to be perfectly clear: I don’t really think writers are under any obligation to take their fans out for madcap alcohol-fueled misadventures when they meet them. Quite the opposite. I meant for my piece to be as much a bit of self-deprecation about my own out-of-whack expectations as anything else. To put things in perspective, my entire readership could probably carpool to the next Karmageddon in one mid-sized vehicle, so my intention was never to turn masses of people against you — nor was it to send you a personal message. If I were going to write you personally, I would’ve focused on the nice things — we Americans are more polite than we sometimes come across on our blogs.

I hope that amid all my obnoxiousness, my compliments came through as well. As you can see, I still have your book up in my recommendations section. I really enjoyed reading it, and I’m happy to promote it. You’re a terrific writer, and I hope I convinced at least a few people to pick up a copy of “Join Me” for themselves. I had a great time at the signing, too, and I’m really glad I went. You’re a very natural and entertaining speaker, and the fact that most of the crowd didn’t seem familiar with the book and yet walked out buying copies proves that you more than did your job that night. You entertained us, and you sold your book — which is two things more than most authors probably do at their signings.

I’m glad you had a good time in America. And I’d like to remain a proud joinee, if you’ll have me. Next time you’re in LA, feel free to drop me a line.

And I promise, the beer’s on me.

Cheers back atcha!

Jerry

P.S. I don’t want you to think I’m the kind of guy who says one thing on his site and then writes you privately and kisses your ass, so I’ve posted this letter on my site so that anyone who read the last piece can read this, too.

Though I may have given the impression that Danny’s signing was disappointing, I think I can accurately say that nobody else in attendance seemed at all disappointed — well, except maybe for the Long-Haired Guy. But I don’t blame Danny for not inviting him out for a beer, as he seemed a little weird.

Of course, with my luck, Long-Haired Guy probably reads this blog, too.

No hard feelings, Long-Haired Guy.