Exciting news. My book now has something in common with Tolstoy’s War and Peace, Faulkner’s The Sound and the Fury and Snooki’s Confessions of a Guidette. It’s listed on Amazon! You can see the cover, you can read the description, you can even click on a button to pre-order it (hint, hint).
Yes, that’s my cover. I’m very happy to report that my publisher, Taylor Trade, hired the incredible David Heatley, who did my blog banner, to design the cover, and it’s exactly everything I wanted my book cover to be, because David is awesome and brilliant and Taylor Trade is the best.
I warned you this moment was coming. I told you I would start a full-on marketing blitz at some point. So here’s what I’m asking you to do. Ready…?
DON’T ORDER IT!
Well, yes, of course I want you to order it. Just not yet.
As I write this, my book is currently ranked #2,036,591 on Amazon. (Suck it, whoever’s #2,036,592!)
It’s not as bad as it sounds. It just got listed, and it doesn’t come out until May 8, 2014. Hopefully I can crack the top 2 million by then.
Now, here’s my silly strategy for getting my book off to a good start with preorders…
You may know that Amazon updates its sales rankings hourly. That means if you order my book right now, it might go up a few hundred thousand positions, and I would be incredibly grateful. Then, it would slowly sink back down again and in a few days, it might rest back in the high 1-millions/low 2-millions.
But what if, I wondered… what if everyone who’s going to preorder it did so at the same time, like within the same 1-hour period? What if I could get my book to rank, even briefly, within the top 1,000, maybe higher? Best case scenario, it would help my book get noticed. Maybe a few more people would order it. Maybe a few more booksellers would choose to stock it. Worst case scenario, it would make me feel good, and that’s nice, too.
So if you’re on board, join me in — oh, let’s call it my Amazing Amazon Preorder Chart Twerk. (Note: I’m still unclear on what twerking actually is.) We’ll twerk it together on Friday, October 4, as close to 12pm EST as you can do it.
This means you, people who’ve told me you can’t wait to preorder my book. This means you, people who like books that are funny and touching and about me. This means you, Mom! This means all of you!
The best part is this: Amazon has a pre-order price guarantee, so you won’t actually pay what it says right now. You’ll be billed when the book ships, and you’ll pay whatever the lowest price was between now and the day you first get to hold the book in your happy little hands. The current price is 10% off retail, but I’ve seen Amazon list it for as much as 25% off over the last few days. I’ll bet they’ll have that deal again over the next 7 1/2 months. Who knows. It may even go lower. (It’s a little like gambling — how fun!)
Let me repeat: Instead of preordering my book now, mark your calendar for Friday October 4, and do it then. (Don’t worry. If you check here or on my Facebook page, I’ll be reminding you.)
And if you’re worried you’ll forget or you think this is silly or you think, “Hey, cracking the top 2 million is pretty good, Jerry, don’t get greedy,” then feel free to order it right this second. Here. At this link. Go on!
I promise I won’t be mad.
UPDATE: I’ll definitely be posting, Facebooking, tweeting and twerking about this again before the big day, but if you want an email reminder on October 4 at go time, just leave me a comment here stating as such, and I’ll add you to the list. Just make sure you enter your email in the appropriate box when you type your comment, and then I’ll have it.
You can count on me to order!
Woohoo! Thanks, Mary!
I’m down for the group pre-order twerk! I’m asking for another reminder on the day, please.
Consider it done! Thanks!
I’m on it.
See you on October 4, Amazon.com.
Chuck, you rule. And I may have underestimated your Frogger skills in the past. Forgive me.
Wow congrats! !! And that is an excellent marketing strategy! You’re brilliant 🙂
ps…. if you reallllly want the definition of twerk…. google miley cyrus twerking. Heheheh you’re welcome
Great, now where can I get those giant teddy bears to dance around everyone while they preorder? 😛
Thanks! Hope it works!
I will be setting my work calendar, my cell phone alarm, and my co-workers to all remind me to buy this book at the designated time!
I don’t know. Better tattoo it on your hand too, just in case. 🙂
We are so in!!
Will there be an e-book available?
Yes, absolutely. I’m not sure if they do a preorder for ebooks, though. You can definitely get one when the book is released next May.
Awesome, I was going to ask the same question (I read all my books on my Kindle if possible)
I will try with all my might to remember to do this Oct 4th! I can appreciate wanting to get noticed. That what all is writers dream of… despite what some may admit. Wonder if there’s a way you can set a reminder for your fans, create a reminder link? Maybe?
I’ll definitely be posting about it again, but I know not everyone checks the blog every day. I’d be happy to email people to remind them. Let me know if you want in on that. Either way, thanks!
I sure would! email@example.com 🙂
Thank, Jerry! I can’t wait to read your book!
Count me in. Is this for a paper version or can I also order a Kindle copy?
Only the hardcover is available for preorder now, but there will be an ebook, too. You might have to wait for release day for that one, though. 🙂
please send me the reminder!
I will be ordering mine via e-book (Nook) but GOOD LUCK 🙂
Thanks! I’d probably get the ebook myself, if it wasn’t my book. 😉
Got the reminder on my calendar! I even have a reminder set for the reminder :p
Remind me to tell you you’re awesome! Thanks!
Remind me, Jerry. I will order.
Definitely remind me, Jerry. Congrats on the great accomplishment and continued great writing! Jason
Thanks, Jason. I’ve got you down!
Sign me up for a reminder!
Good luck with the launch.
Done — and thanks!
I don’t even know you Mr. Mahoney but just loved the entire concept of this book. Count me in. Pls sent a reminder to firstname.lastname@example.org.
All right! Thanks… and nice to meet you!
sorry typo, my email is email@example.com
Remind me again and again Jerry! Very exciting news. I liked you as a mild mannered “geek” but even more as a superdad author. I´m in. I will donate it to the Pink Iceland library after I read it 🙂
You’re the best, Snorri. I actually talk a little bit about my time in Iceland in the book. They should love that at the Pink Iceland library! 🙂
Lol I read twerking and thought of Miley Cyrus not a pretty picture. I will try and remember this.
Thanks! I will try not to make you think of Miley Cyrus again. 🙂
Remind me on the 4th too, please!
I don’t want to see you twerk. Promise me, no twerking.
Don’t worry — I don’t want to see me twerk either.
You know, if you’re going to call this a twerk, I think you owe it to your fans to post yourself twerking every day until October 4th. It’s what the internet wants.
Sorry, I just promised another commenter I wouldn’t actually twerk. Darn. I so would’ve been up for this.
Im in…most things are better in groups so I’m assuming this also goes for a twerk/order!!
I’m in. Friday 9am PST.
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Jerry, you need to start a Thunderclap! Then all these lovely folks who are agreeing to buy at the same time could also sign up to automatically send out tweets and Facebook messages and such and attract even more sales during the designated hour! https://www.thunderclap.it/
Oh and please put me on the reminder list!
Thanks for the tip, Sarah. I’ve never heard of Thunderclap, but I’ll check into it now!
I went to their site, Sarah. Seems like a great service, but it also seems like it’s intended for activism and social causes. I just couldn’t see starting something up there that would benefit me financially. That would feel too icky. Glad I learned about it, though, and thanks for the idea! 🙂
Now that you mention it, I guess you’re right. And I love that you thought it would feel icky.
Wine maker Mekamifu Nikolas is absolutely addicted to cyrstal shoes, ancestry,genealogy, airbrushing.
Finally she gets stimulated by checking out different towns, cities and
nations around the world particularly to Ho Chi Minh City.
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Wait…you have a book coming out?
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I’m curious to find out what blog platform you happen to be utilizing?
I’m having some minor security problems with my latest website and I would like to find
something more safeguarded. Do you have any solutions?
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